


I Was Lost

by WoahWaitWhat



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: ??? maybe idk, DAI spoilers probably, Dysfunctional Family, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, I might have oc have a love interest, Kinda, Modern Girl in Thedas, Other, dorian is bestfriend, first fic, goodness me so much fluff, i always feel like there isn't enough, most likely, oc into thedas, pls be nice yeah?, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-25
Updated: 2015-11-12
Packaged: 2018-04-17 03:39:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4650855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WoahWaitWhat/pseuds/WoahWaitWhat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[ This is literally the only thing I've ever written besides school essays]<br/>Luna finally decided to end everything she had know. Relieved knowing it would all be over, she didn't have to worry anymore. Being sent to a new world and knowing nothing about it but hazy images from her old life was not something she was expecting.<br/>I suck at summaries, so read please?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Beginning

 

 

 

 

> Chapter 1: Leaving Behind it All
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> PLEASE READ AUTHOR NOTE FOR THIS CHAPTER
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> **"He found himself understanding the wearisomeness of this life, where every oath was an improvisation and a considerable part of one`s waking life was spent watching one`s feet."**
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> -Lord of the Flies, William Golding
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The bold print sits on the bright screen of my phone,

"I can't believe it took you this long."

Then my phone went dead.

It was from my own sister, thats okay though. I was expecting something like that.

I stared at the black screen.

I wanted to cry. I wanted to scream and yell and break the damned thing. Anything would have been better than the emotionless stare I saw looking at me from the reflection. What I saw staring back was a fragile looking girl, hollow cheeks, pale greyish skin, light freckles, sunken red-rimmed, hazel eyes, and pale, almost white, blonde hair ,forming in curls falling down part of my face. Disgusting.

This world was getting tiresome. I was exhausted. I wanted to leave.   

I sat up, walking over to stand in the middle of my room. I looked around, seeing the many items that once brought happy memories to me, now only seeming like another`s possessions being stored into an once empty, unused space. The pictures of my friends, now no longer with me, they were sick of my "moping", my stuffed animals from wherever i had gotten them, I can't remember much of the old times anymore, its foggy, and my instruments, I only played them to impress my parents, they held no significant value. The only thing in the room that actually felt like mine was my book, an old handwritten book of some poems dated back to who knows when, it never had a title. I had found it at the pond that was near my run down apartment one day and have added my own so far, and even now I haven't let it go. It may be the only thing I`ll regret leaving behind.

I pick up my poems, and walked into the bathroom, no need to lock the door, no one will come see me for a while anyways. 

_***Honestly guys I'm serious, this is a possible trigger warning and I don't want anyone hurt, so don't read this part if it'll trigger you!!*** _

With shaking and quivering hands, I picked up the pill bottle. Honestly, I was scared, terrified actually, but I knew that this world was not for me. Maybe i`ll be reborn somewhere new. Somewhere where I can be happy and not have to worry about the pressures of life and live free. With the pills in my hand, I quickly threw them down my throat. I knew it might take a little while, so I sat down and read my poems. It wasn't until I saw wet droplets on my book that I noticed I was crying. This almost felt bitter-sweet. How? I don't know. It just did. 

My vision was growing black, there was a slight pain in my throat and stomach, and my eyes felt like they had weights sitting on them, but I continued to stubbornly read. If this was the last time i`d see my precious friend, my only friend, the only one who's understood, the one who I've written all my feeling into and had had another write theirs into them, then I would do my damned hardest to stay with them for as long as I possibly could.

It was getting harder to breath, I could barely see anything anymore. With the last of my strength, I picked up my pen, and wrote.

**"Thank you for being my friend, Im sorry"**

Would something as simple as a book cry for me?

My vision was gone, and in that last sorry, I was gone then too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, serious talk. Suicide is a no no okay? just cause I wrote my girl to think that doesn't mean I want you to think that, if you ever need someone to rant at, I'm here, like all the time, 24/7. Be it for depression or your cat pissed you off, i got you girl or guy or they or maybe giraffe , who knows.  
> Anyways, this really is my first fic. Ive never written anything like this. So if i mess up or something doesn't sound quite right, could you tell me? I aced history not english.  
> I actually have a lot planned for this, so i need motivation yo, one person is all i need. A kudos or comment (is that what its called?idk) is all I need, just one. I won't do this for anything else. Just knowing one person wants me to continue is enough.


	2. Where?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaalright, I got a Kudo thingy! You know what that means?! Another chapter!! wooooo.

> Chapter 2: Sky..what?
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> **"You still have a lot of time to make yourself be what you want."**
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> -S.E Hinton, The Outsiders
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I woke up to the feeling of something wet nudging my cheek. I try opening my eyes, but I couldn't.

_So tired, everything hurts..._ I thought. 

I finally am i able to open my eyes. The bright sun glares at me and I go to cover my face. I sit up, leaning against a tree, grunting from my sore muscles.

_Wait, no. Oh no no no no, this isn't real. It can't be. But I._

Mentally panicking I quickly try to calm down and look about my surroundings.

"Trees, tress, oh... thats not a tree.."

Standing a fews inches away from me was... a deer? No, not a deer. It was tall and stood as proud as it looked. Tall antlers shone in the sun and its purple and red fur looked soft. It patted its foot on the ground, as if trying to get my attention. It looked irritated.

"Oh, I'm sorry, am I in your way? Would you like me to move?"

As if sighing, it huffed, moving to my right side and lying down. It looked at me, shaking its head.

"Can you understand me? Thats really nice. So if I'm not in your way, then whats the matter?"

Shoving my hands aside with its nose, it lays its head on my lap. Looking down at it, I smile. Carefully bringing my hand to hover over its head, I silently ask permission to pet it. Slowly, I lower my hand, resting it on his head and begin to softly pet him in a rhythmic motion. We both sit there for a while in a peaceful silence. I take this time to fully look around. It looks like I'm in a little clearing, surrounded by tall trees and every now and then i would see a bush of berries or a patch of flowers. There were little patches of snow here and there, though I felt no cold at all, the animal giving me all the warmth I need.

"You know, I've never been this calm before and I've only known you for a little while." I giggle a little. "Nor have i smiled this much either, though I've always been more comfortable with animals. Is that what your trying to do? Calm me down?" A sound of confirmation came from it, and I smiled.

"So, im guessing your a "he", yeah?" Once again another sound is made. 

"Okay. So.. Oh No!" I must have startled him, because he got up and looked around, thinking there was danger near by.

With tears in my eyes I start franticly looking around for my book.

"If I'm here that **must** mean that my book is here!"

The animal does a little huff,catching my attention, he was probably a little annoyed that I scared him so suddenly. He goes behind a couple of trees, I wait for him, hoping he wasn't so annoyed that he decided to leave. Much to my pleasure he came back after a minute or two, carrying something in his mouth. He slowly walks over to me, and sets something on my lap, I make a cry of relief when i see it my book. Getting up, tears still in my eyes, I wrap my arms around his neck, barely reaching his head.

"Thank you, thank you so much."

He nuzzles the top of my head, welcoming me. He`s warm... He makes me feel happy, something I haven't felt in so long, that it startled me when I realized it.

Looking up at him i ask, "Will you stay with me? Please? I promise i`ll be the best friends ever." He nuzzles me again. It must means he accepts.

"Okay, do you know where we are? Maybe somewhere we can stay? Like a town?"

He slowly starts to walk away. Stopping when I didn't start to follow him. Quickly catching up with him, I smile, and decide to trust him to know where we`re going.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, so the idea is that animals make her happy, and since in her "past life" , I guess, she wasn't around others much, it shows that she would be more shy and awkward around non animals. Yeah? Yeah. She's polite if you couldn't guess, or at least I hope I made her seem polite. I mean, if asking a wild animal if you`re in their way isn't polite, I don't know what is.  
> So anyways, Im hoping to be able to update this multiple times a week. Idk, maybe not, school just started not even a week ago, and my home town fair is starting up this week. But I promise to make time to update.  
> Once again, if you see any mistakes or a sentence that seems a little awkward, please tell me!!! I like being able to know!   
> Thank you for reading chapter two!! Don't worry ill get to the other characters later, I just want to build up Luna`s and the harts relationship first. Speaking of the heart, give me ideas for his name!! Okay bye now >.


	3. Warm Welcoming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sigh.. ten lil kudos, so happy. Anyways... yay! Guardian like figures and mushy fluffiness, and also a wee bit of heart to heart. :>

 

> Chapter 3: Warm Welcoming 
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> "That’s the thing about people who mean everything they say. They think everyone else does too."
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> -The Kite Runner, Khaled Hosseini
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A full week it was until we made it to a town. When we got there all I heard anyone talk about was how the old couple in the house at the end of the village shouldn't be there. They also mentioned Templars. It sounded familiar, how? I don't know. But it made me nervous. I wanted to ask why, but my new friend would push me away from the gossipers, steering me in a different direction. A commotion in the market area started up, wanting to go see, I walked over. An old man was kneeling on the ground, picking up his purchases from the ground.

_Why was so one helping?_

Yes, he was old, but he also looked  _older._ The tired kind of worn, a worn I've seen many times in myself. He ignored the people whispering around him, slowly gathering his things. It was taking him a while. His work worn hands were shaking and twitching. Gathering the courage i could muster, I kneel next to him. The crowd around me go silent, and watch me as I help the elder. The man stares at me, whether in disbelief or in shock i don't know. It probably doesn't matter. Someone steps up, reaching their hand towards me to stop me, but my friend intervenes, stepping between me and the person. Grabbing the last of the elders things, I stand up, and hold my hand out to help him. Still in slight shock, he numbly grabs my hand. I pull him away from the crowd gently.

"House."

The man looks at me in confusion, "I..What?"

Worried I perhaps did something wrong, I repeat myself. Trying to get past my own anxiety.

"Y-your house? Which way is it? I can help you carry your things."

He stares at me for a couple seconds, gather his thoughts, all the while making me more nervous each second. He seems to snap out of it, because he looks to me, and smiles. It made me happy. 

_I did something right. Im so glad._

Not letting go of my hand, we silently walk to his home. My friend following us from a distance, probably making sure none of the villagers bother us along the way. As we get closer, I realizes that his home is the one the others were loudly gossiping about, though how one gossips loudly I wouldn't know. Staying strong, I continue to follow him. Surely this man couldn't be bad right? He`s done nothing evil yet so far. And my friend seems calm, so It can't be that bad. Speaking of my friend, I need to get him a name. Maybe later.

As we reach the house, I notice how run down it seems. I feel a surge of sadness looking at it. Someone as old as him and who seems so worn should be living in at least some comfort. As the man leads me inside, I look around my surroundings. It is a small house, with one room when you walk in, seems to be a kitchen like area. An old splintery table sits in the center of the room, two chairs on each side.

_Two. Does that mean there`s another person here?_

I set down his item on the small table and help him sit on one of the chairs. I ask him where he would like me to store his things, he directs me towards and old cupboard sitting in a dusty corner. I start putting the items away, the elder begins a conversation, mostly one-sided.

"Thank you for helping me, I wasn't quite expecting it." he states kindly. I nod politely in reply.

"Whats your name young`un?"

"Luna." I state quietly.

"Luna, huh? Quite a pretty name there. My dear wife once wanted to name our child that, but hen we realized it would quite match him." He laughs, and continues, "No, our dear boy would be regretting having us as parents if we named him that. We just stuck with a simple name, William. My he grew to be quite the handsome one I tell you, there was this one time...."

I had sat down by the time he started the story. He talked about his son with such kindness and love in his eyes, it almost made me jealous. I sat listening to him, nodding everyone in a while. His son seemed to be quite the troublemaker. He continued on for a while, I didn't mind. He seemed to be telling me his sons whole life, cheerful all the while. It wasn't until he was getting to the time his son was out in the field doing work, that he became sullen.

"He wanted to do the years harvest by himself that year, practically begged me, and I finally let him. He was out there pulling out the veggies when they got him, those damn templars, took him right when I turned my back. I ran over, demanding they let my son go.  _All mages must be taken care of, for the peace of the people of course._  Is what they said to me. My family have always been well acquainted with magic, runs in our blood. How they found out, I don't know. I didn't even know my son had magic. I thought he had been spared from it, but I guess not." There were tears in his eyes by now, I gently put a hand on his shoulder. "They sent me a letter not even 3 weeks later, saying that he died during his horrowing. If only I had told him no that year. Why couldn't they have taken me?!" He was crying, I didn't know what to do.

"You know," I said quietly, "I never had much of a family, I lived alone for a long time, and though I don't know much about families, I think that your son was happy having you as a father. He wouldn't have been happy to see you be taken away." I had tears in my eyes now too. I wasn't used to this much emotion, nor was I used to any social interactions, but I tried to make myself seem comforting. 

He looked over at me with a sad smile, he opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by violent coughing coming from behind a door I hadn't noticed earlier. He quickly tries to get up, going over to the cupboard and bringing out a small vial, making his way through the door.

_That would explain the second chair._

I slowly walk over, peeking through the doorway. A frail, thin, pale, and sickly looking woman sat in the bed, drinking from the vial. when she finishes she hands the vial  off to the man. She then looks at me, and smiles. I blush and stand straighter, looking at my feet. The man notices and looks at me, waving his hand to tell me to come over. 

"Judith, this is Luna, She helped my in the market today." The lady smiles and gently grabs my hand with her frailer one.

"Why thank you little lady. Oh my, and a pretty one at that."

I blush even harder and softly thank her. The man chuckles.

"Hugh, could I talk to her for a bit?" He smiles and leaves the room. I nervously look around, never have I been treated this nicely by actual people before. They treat me like they've known me for years, when I've only know Mr.Hugh for a couple hours, and Mrs. Judith for only a minute or two.

As the door shuts, we sit in silence. She looks at me, evaluating. She's still smiling, still holding my hand, still holding the kindness in her eyes, I see no malice.

"My dear, how long have you been alone?" The question surprises me. I sit there, actual thinking about it. How long? I honestly don't know. But if i learned anything, its that lying only leads to making myself feel bad, so I answer.

"A long time Mrs, Its been a very long time. But I've recently made a friend, I don't know his name, but he's very kind. And I've just made two more, you and Mr.Hugh. I feel very lucky ma`am." It was my honest answer, I was tired of being alone. 

She looks at me for a little longer. "Little Luna. I think thats what ill call you." It was out of the blue, but I didn't argue. "Now, are you staying anywhere?" I shake my head, saying no. "Well, then gull have to stay here then." She say, already seemed to have made up her mind.

I was shocked, but humbled, and also very sad. No, not upset sad, but a happy sad. The kindness from this elderly couple surprises me and I didn't quite know what to do with myself. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WAAHHHH?!?!?! You see those? Kudos?! Theres like ten of them, I'm so happy!!! It may not seem like much to others, but thats TEN people who like my story... TEN! Its amazing, anyways. Im sorry theres not much of our dear hart friend. This chapter was mostly focused around the super overly nice elderly couple. I know, the whole thing is kind of everywhere. Need I say it again? Aced history not english. Ask me which Roman Emperor switched to christianity before he died and I could tell you, but ask me to write a two paragraph essay and i`ll give you shit smeared on a piece of paper. But I did make up my awful writing with making this chapter longer! And there`ll be a surprise about our dear Luna in the next chapter! Anyway, my neck hurts from typing this in a weird position and its late, I'm gong to bed! Goodnight darlings!


	4. Chapter 4: Just

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SHHHHEEES AAALLIIIVVEEEE, I am so sorry haha oops

 

**Chapter 4: Just.....**

 

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> **“But grief makes a monster out of us sometimes . . . and sometimes you say and do things to the people you love that you can’t forgive yourself for.” ― Melina Marchetta, Jellicoe Road**
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        The weather was cold.

       Wind smacked harshly at my face and rain hit me from above. I didn't care. Not even when the wet ground soaked through my dress and threw chills through my body or when the third hour struck and the village children threw rocks at me to see if I was breathing. No, I couldn't feel barely anything at all actually. Only the rough texture of the grave under my hand. It wasn't supposed to be like this. She was supposed to live. To get better and be happy. I wanted her to be able to help with the next harvest. To see Mr.Hugh laugh again. 

**It wasn't supposed to be like this.**

       

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       I'd been with them for a couple months now, Mrs. Judith was getting better, but Mr.Hugh wouldn't smile anymore. I didn't know what to do. I was scared. He stopped smiling after I had a little incident with the stove. I was cooking dinner for the night when.. well I guess I kinda just... blew it up? Well, anyway. Thats when we found out I was a mage. An unorthodox way to find out but at least I knew now. They started teaching me how to use my new found skill and how to control it. By we I mean Mrs.Judith. Mr. Hugh was scared I think. He lost his son to magic after all, well.... technically. He wouldn't laugh or make jokes, he just wasn't him. I missed his jokes and kind nature. I think he just... gave up. Three weeks into my "training" he left. He just got up, said he'd be back, and left. My friend had disappeared too. Mrs. Judith was worried and, most likely, scared. I tried so, so hard to comfort her, to tell her everything would be fine. But she never stopped crying. It was two weeks later after he left, when she passed. She just gave out. She held my hand, told me she loved me, and just... left. I was alone in that house. It was so empty. I was so... well I was ready to leave too. But I couldn't. She wasn't meant to sit in that bed till she rotted away. Someone had to.. move her.

      A day and a half it took me to dig her grave. I laid her down in it, on a bed of forget-me-nots. Because I sure wouldn't forget her. When the grave was filled. I sat there and chipped at a large stone, putting words of love in her name. When it was over, I just sat there and read my poems to her, she always liked them. Said they made her feel better.

     Hugh came back on the fourth day after Judith died. He came in, sat in a chair, and laid his head down. I tried talking to him, asking where he was, what he'd been doing. But he wouldn't answer. After hours of just sitting there with him, emotionlessly, I spoke up.

     "She's gone.", I didn't know another way to put it. He sat up, and just stared at me. he just... stared and stared... and stared some more. Until he got up, walked towards me, raised his hand, and brought it down. The sound echoed around us, my head slanted to the side. Eyes widened. He told me to leave, that it was my fault. And so... I left. I walked out, and went to her grave. I was there for hours.

    **Wind smacked harshly at my face and rain hit me from above. I didn't care. Not even when the wet ground soaked through my dress and threw chills through my body or when the third hour struck and the village children threw rocks at me to see if I was breathing. No, I couldn't feel barely anything at all actually. Only the rough texture of the grave under my hand. It wasn't supposed to be like this. She was supposed to live. To get better and be happy. I wanted her to be able to help with the next harvest. To see Mr.Hugh laugh again.**

**It wasn't supposed to be like this.**

I came back to an empty and trashed house, why did I come back? He was all I had left. But he was gone again. So I took what I would need. Food, some gold, and a weapon. It was Judith's. A beautiful white bow, carvings of Halla and Crystal Graces. She told me stories of when she was younger. She`d go out and adventure. She promised me she'd tell me some stories. But I guess its too late for that. 

**And then I left.**

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahahahhahha, wowow. I come back months later and I give you this shit. Im so sorry. Not only is it sad but its also awfully written, oh man. Im the worst. But aaayyye shout out @Princess+Stabbity for commenting (lol first comment) and just being such a doll. Anywho, I gotta go ruin more peoples lives with sadness. So bye bye


End file.
